What people don't know...

Today, I was looking at my step-mom's facebook. And she has recently added some pictures to her profile thing. And one of her friends commented on the album, "aaah you guys look like the cutes family!!" I'm assuming "cutes" refers to cutest but Idk! It just made me think, it must seem nice and cute but you don't see the hurt and pain that is behind all that! When I was in 8th grade I wrote a poem about that! Their life is so easy, it's simple! They are complete, my little sister has and always will have a mom and a dad at home. She will never know what it's like not to, and I'm really glad, it's not any fun! But my step-mom just pushes my brother and I aside. We aren't hers and she doesn't really want us! I get that but her resentment impedes my relationship with my father!

When you look on the side where she has listed her children, she has her first born my little sister and then Myself and my brother! The thing that saddens me the most is that my little brother who pasted away when he was 6 months old isn't even mentioned.

I miss him alot! I never knew him though! The first time I saw him was in his casket! That sweet little boy! He looked just like a perfect little doll! For years after, I wasn't able to sing the song "I lived in Heaven" at all without tearing up! He was so perfect, he didn't even have to stay here! The best part about having a little brother who pasted away is that I know he is always looking out for me!!

Sometimes I wish my dad and step-mom would go through just a portion of the pain I went through! To know the hurt and complications that I have experienced due to the break of my old family and the formation of their new family! It must be nice to have "the perfect family"!

But despite all of the things I've gone through with my parents divorce and a mean step-mom, I will have a successful family. I will love my children the way mom loved me and I will take the things that my father took from me and I will realize their importance and teach them to my children! I can't wait! And maybe one day my dad will really realize how great his daughter is! I can only dream right!!